The Verdict is in!

Today we went to the doctor...My poor poor Doctor.  So two weeks ago I meet with his Partner who really helped me feel good about pushing more for doing a VBAC.  My Doctor was OK with me "trying" to do one but really thought that I was not a very good candidate.  But after talking to the other doctor I felt like I actually could be a good candidate.  So Any way today was the day to talk to him about it.  I really Love my OB I think he is a great doctor and really listens to me... We were in his office for 45 min talking to him.  I had a list of all things I wanted to talk about because I always forget:) He was so patient with me Answered all my questions. We came to the point that my body willing he would let me go over and try for a VBAC.  I was still torn on what to do.  I have anxiety and I like the fact that with a c-section I know when she will come and no surprises.  But I REALLY wanted a VBAC but was so affraid that I would labor again for 24 hours just to end in an emergency C-section.  So it really had been weighing heavy on me what to do.  (  I have prayed about this and came to peace that if I was showing signs of progressing that I would try for VBAC but if by week 36 if I was not I would just do a C-section b/c a planned c-section is much better experience (so I hear) then an emergency.  So after talking with him about Several things We went ahead and schedule a C-section so I could have the day I want/availability with the known that I could CX it at anytime.  While we where scheduling it with the Nurse the Doc decided to go back and look at notes from having Logan... Well lets just say the decision was made I NO longer had options. 
-background:
When you have a C-section they cut horizontal on the outside and depending on the baby and how it is in your tummy they cut you horizontal or vertical on the inside....If you have any vertical cuts/ or tears you are at high risk for your Uterine wall to rupture during a birth which results bleed to death and other complication. 
So with that said apparently while pulling Logan out of the womb I got a tear going vertical that needed to be stitched up therefore resulting in NO VBAC:( 
To be honest it was a huge relief to hear this....Not because I did not want a VBAC I really did but not knowing the unknown and just waiting was really stressing me out.  Now I can plan and be ready. Ians mom already bought her tkt to fly down here and help so she will be here when we schedule it and I just feel at peace with it.  So we will have baby girl June 30 @ 7:30am.  Logan will still be asleep when we go in and so it will work out that by the time he gets up and dressed etc.  I should be ready for them to come up and see baby!! The Doc says because it is scheduled that I will most likely be able to go home a day earlier then I did with Logan b/c you just heal faster which was music to my ears I wanted to leave the hospital so bad with Logan I was there for 5 days.  
I am really sad that I will never have the opportunity to deliver V but I think I have come to peace with it. It was a really hard road excepting it after Logan but I think It will be much easier emotionally this time b/c I know its going to go down this way!
(I know I used c-section and VBAC alot just in case you did not notice I thought I would point it out:) VBAC= vaginal birth after cesarean I had this whole confo with this girl and at the end she goes now what is a vbac so just in case I am not assuming anymore.