Preslee Rose Fackrell

Preslee Rose Fackrell

7.5 LBS 20 Inches

6-30-2011

8:43A.M

I can not believe it has been two weeks.  I have been wanting to post this plus birth story for a while its just finding the time to do it and also the words to know how to write everything that happen.  There was a little complication when delivery started we are both doing amazing now but I ended up having a Heart attack minutes before they where going to deliver Preslee.  For now I am just posting this just for those who keep asking for pictures but i will Soon post about the whole thing.  (Yes I know its hard to believe at 27 I really did have a Heart Attack and I really am doing good...Thank you priesthood blessing and Heavenly Father)

Here are a few pictures and I through one in of Logan cause he is just so cute and getting so big!

 I love her little toes all pointed

 I love this little boy! he is so happy b/c he is about to go Swim with Daddy

about to go home:) OH HAPPY DAY!

Emotions

FOUR Days!!! So I am kinda stumped on what to really write but I just feel Like I really should and then it came to me that I wanted to write a little of what has been going on the last couple of weeks to be able to remember the last weeks with only One child.  Lets just say the last oh three weeks have been crazy! Crazy not in the way of me doing things to get ready for the baby but crazy b/c we have been way sick.  I have had no voice for two and Half weeks I finally got it back about Saturday. Our schedule has been way off Logan has been sleeping and eating like you would not believe.  I think it has been a blessing but its been kinda hard to get him back on a good schedule.  We have been sleeping in tell like ten and then really not doing anything the rest of the day.  I was planning on swimming everyday and just spending some fun time with him...We have spent lost of time together just not out and about more like lying in bed cuddling.  He is not that big of a cuddlier but the last couple of weeks he can not cuddle me enough he has just been so cute.  He will talk and talk and then say mama and give me a kiss like over and over its cute but then your like OK enough kisses:) and he will just come give me a hug and then pat my back.  I love this little boy so much.  He also can not get close enough to me he will be on my lap on my tummy but he just wants to get closer and it kills my belly but he just wants to be with me.  I am not sure if its b/c we have all been under the weather or if he is sensing that something is changing or probably both.  The only thing with the whole sleeping in thing is that he WILL not take a nap...NO BUENO.  I am grateful that we lounge in the morning especially b/c  I am moving sooo slow these days but then come 5 I am going crazy b/c we have been stuck inside all day with no nap.  We are starting to get back on sleeping right but really until the baby comes I think this is just the way its gotta be.
We have done some fun things we have been swimming quite a bit and Logan LOVES the water he so wants to just swim I am thinking next summer it will come to him.  He loves when me and Ian count 123 and then push him under the water back and fourth.  If we do not count fast enough he will start saying 1 3  its so cute.  I went under the water and so he thought he should try it he is so brave...in the water he gets scared going down slides:) We also have been going to these little kid music concert every wed.  They are fun Logan is not sure about them he stays close by but its been fun getting out of the house lets hope for next year he will get up and dance and enjoy it better. 
Lets see we have gone to play group well like once its a lot of work to go to play group for me its at a big pool where Logan cant stand so with his no fear I have to chase him and its just a lot of work. 

This is WAY long sorry
So I have been wanting to nest and then I just have nothing to give and I have been so frustrated with it.  I have so much to do to get ready for my mother in law to come and baby but just not an inch of energy to do anything.  I feel like I just sit here and look at everything that needs to get done and then I cant and I get so frustrated.  It is coming together but I just wish I could get up and just work work work like i normally can.  I think I have got to the point of it is what it is.  Its really not bad I just am way weird aka pairinord about my house looking clean ( I know I have Issues with it)  but instead of cleaning I have decided that Oh I am just sitting here Why don't I sew...BAD IDEA! Cause it seems to be when the boys go to be and it gets late and then I stay up way late b/c I make mistakes b/c I am so tired.   I have sewn a diaper bag which I had decided I would not do and then last week was like oh I can do that silly me and then when I cut it out I did not cut on the fold which throw the whole thing off I was able to redeem it with re cutting as much as I could(I was using fabric I had so did not have much extra) and then my mom helped me save it.  I think I could have done it on my own I just was so over it that I think if i tried i just would have said forget so I am glad she helped.  It turned out pretty cute.
So when I was in the middle of making the bag and it was not working I decided to start a new project I know way smart and messed that one up, well kinda.  I decided to make a car seat blanket cover thingy.  My friend gave me her pattern and said it was way easy. leave it to me to mess it up.  Oh did I mention that I really am not a sewer I just kinda make it up as I go from watching my mom and free tutorials.  So on this pattern it said fold in HALF and round the edge MAKE SURE NOT TO CUT ON FOLD Well I did not cut on fold but I did think oh it would be easier to cut if i made it smaller to cut aka in FOURTHS I don't know what I was thinking well it was way late so I cut it I now have more then just rounded edges.  I think it actually is going to turn out pretty good and different then all the others.  It just was harder to sew instead of just a straight line I had to go up and down all the half circle.  Its still not finish but hopefully I will tomorrow:)
So then Saturday night I decided to make a fourth of July Wreath that was well another this should take an hour turned into two and then another hour tonight but IT IS FINISHED!!! It turned out so cute I am glad I made it. 
I do still have a lot of things I want to get down but I am just going to go with it and not stress if I get them done great if not oh well. 
We have a crazy week which will be good it will help the week go fast.  lost of Dr appointment and MIL coming in. 
I cant wait to meet this little girl I am way nervous to have two kids and I hope Logan does good is it crazy that it makes me a little sad for Logan to not be the only child I spoil him so much I hope this does not rock his world too much.  Thank you to all my friends who have helped me and send your love I really need it I have the personality that I need to feel needed and loved. 
Please come visit me I may look like crap but I really like visitors with Logan I got baby blues so I am hoping to not this time and visitors will help!
I know this is way long and ALL over the place so hopfully you could follow it:)

Stressed!

This is a MAJOR understatement! Baby is coming in two weeks and I am sick! And have been for the past week. Today I have NO voice none Nada and my throat is on fire! I have not been this sick since they took my tonsils out a couple of years ago. I have SO much to do and I can not move.  I went to the doctor Monday and he gave me some stuff to take and I thought I was feeling better yesterday but it was all lie.  I was up all night again (have not sleep more then 2-3 hours a night for a week) And woke up with a bad headache and a really sore throat and my body just aces from A sleeping on the couch(yes Ian kicked me out of bed b/c I was keeping him up) and B coughing so much has made the muscle in my tummy so sore and it kills! I REALLY need to get better I can not move and it is killing me.  I want to do all this stuff with Logan before baby comes and I want  NEED to CLEAN for my mother in law to come to town.  I think this is what is most stressful getting my house ready  for my MIL to come. She has never seen our new house and not that she really cares but I am putting a lot of stress on myself for her coming...more then having this baby.  I feel so overwhelmed.  I feel like all I do is CLEAN and it is never done and never clean.  ( Don't get me wrong I don't have like a crazy messy house) just a little unorganized.  I have my moms pack ratness and my Dads OCD and it drives me crazy. I am not a very organized person I try so hard but its just not me.  and I really want it to be before my MIL comes.  And with being sick I have not got ANYTHING done.  On top of that Ian is gone A LOT I don't think he has had a day of (besides Sunday and even then he has worked them the last couple of weeks) in like two months.  I am making him take Saturday off so we can get things done.  I just hope that I feel better!

One mans Trash another man Treasures

Last summer Ian and I went to the thrift store to find some amazing deals....Well did we ever.  I found a really cute white crib that just so happened to have the color sticker that was 50% off that day.  I really wanted it and Ian thought I was crazy b/c Logan had a crib and at the time No baby # 2 was on the way. But how could I pass up a sleigh bed crib for $29. Yes it needed to maybe be painted but I paint everything any ways so it would be fine.  (Oh i just remembered Logan's crib need the metal bottom thing so that is how I got Ian to let me buy it:) So we bought it and it has been sitting ever since.  Well we pulled it out last weekend to paint it off white to match the hutch I painted and found that we where missing some parts.  So i went on line to get the instructions on how to put it together and see about ordering the parts to find that It had been RECALLED.  My first thought was YAY we could get a new crib then immediately my second thought was is that honest to buy a crib for $29 at a thrift store and then send in the recall to get a new one.  I came to the conclusion that yes it was OK for me to send in the recall b/c that is why it is there to keep your babies safe.  So we did everything they said to send in and away it went.  I was a little nervous (well I am just in nature anyway a nervous person) but you just hope your sending in the right stuff and will they really send you a new one ect ect.  Well I just got the e-mail saying they received all the screws, Pictures, showing we had the crib and will be sending our new crib today!!! YAY! we are getting a new crib.  I have no Idea what crib we are getting but I know it has to be better then the one we have. I will post picture when we get the new one.  I was going to paint the old one off white to match but I will not paint the new one we will just let it be:) It makes me want to go to the thrift store and see what other Treasures I can find. 

The Verdict is in!

Today we went to the doctor...My poor poor Doctor.  So two weeks ago I meet with his Partner who really helped me feel good about pushing more for doing a VBAC.  My Doctor was OK with me "trying" to do one but really thought that I was not a very good candidate.  But after talking to the other doctor I felt like I actually could be a good candidate.  So Any way today was the day to talk to him about it.  I really Love my OB I think he is a great doctor and really listens to me... We were in his office for 45 min talking to him.  I had a list of all things I wanted to talk about because I always forget:) He was so patient with me Answered all my questions. We came to the point that my body willing he would let me go over and try for a VBAC.  I was still torn on what to do.  I have anxiety and I like the fact that with a c-section I know when she will come and no surprises.  But I REALLY wanted a VBAC but was so affraid that I would labor again for 24 hours just to end in an emergency C-section.  So it really had been weighing heavy on me what to do.  (  I have prayed about this and came to peace that if I was showing signs of progressing that I would try for VBAC but if by week 36 if I was not I would just do a C-section b/c a planned c-section is much better experience (so I hear) then an emergency.  So after talking with him about Several things We went ahead and schedule a C-section so I could have the day I want/availability with the known that I could CX it at anytime.  While we where scheduling it with the Nurse the Doc decided to go back and look at notes from having Logan... Well lets just say the decision was made I NO longer had options. 
-background:
When you have a C-section they cut horizontal on the outside and depending on the baby and how it is in your tummy they cut you horizontal or vertical on the inside....If you have any vertical cuts/ or tears you are at high risk for your Uterine wall to rupture during a birth which results bleed to death and other complication. 
So with that said apparently while pulling Logan out of the womb I got a tear going vertical that needed to be stitched up therefore resulting in NO VBAC:( 
To be honest it was a huge relief to hear this....Not because I did not want a VBAC I really did but not knowing the unknown and just waiting was really stressing me out.  Now I can plan and be ready. Ians mom already bought her tkt to fly down here and help so she will be here when we schedule it and I just feel at peace with it.  So we will have baby girl June 30 @ 7:30am.  Logan will still be asleep when we go in and so it will work out that by the time he gets up and dressed etc.  I should be ready for them to come up and see baby!! The Doc says because it is scheduled that I will most likely be able to go home a day earlier then I did with Logan b/c you just heal faster which was music to my ears I wanted to leave the hospital so bad with Logan I was there for 5 days.  
I am really sad that I will never have the opportunity to deliver V but I think I have come to peace with it. It was a really hard road excepting it after Logan but I think It will be much easier emotionally this time b/c I know its going to go down this way!
(I know I used c-section and VBAC alot just in case you did not notice I thought I would point it out:) VBAC= vaginal birth after cesarean I had this whole confo with this girl and at the end she goes now what is a vbac so just in case I am not assuming anymore. 

President Monsen said:

Never Let a problem to be solved

become more important

Than a person to

BE LOVED

PINK

That’s right folks PINK we are having a baby girl!! I know what some are you are thinking, I thought you were done with Logan.  We I really felt like I was but then we really got thinking about it and with not really knowing where I was going to go medical wise we decided we should maybe have another before the option was taken away completely. And then if we did have another we wanted to have them close b/c we are already in baby mode and have baby stuff. It took a year with Logan so we really did not know how long it would take us I thought maybe a little longer than it did but it’s going to work out. Her due date is exactly two years from Logan’s due date July 7^th  crazy that it is the same day. I most likely am going to have to have another C-section that is planned for June 3o but I REALLY want to do a VBAC but I really don’t know what way I’ll have her until she comesJ I might get an Idea at my next appointment in two weeks.  So if you haven’t realized I am pretty far along only have like 8 weeks left I am 32 weeks. I really don’t know why I am struggling with posting this one… I guess because we waited so long to tell everyone that when we finally did it did not seem such a big deal to post, and the fact that I kept thinking about all the cute ways I could post it and could come up with nothing so I just kept blowing it off.  But I decided it’s time b/c I want to post so many other things that are going along with it that I just finally said today is the day.  I had my baby shower for her last weekend and got so many cute outfits it really got me excited to meet this little girl and put her in all her little outfits I am really ready for her to come. I am not sure what to expect Logan we thought would come out way dark with dark curly hair brown eyes but no he is my light hair skin blue eyed adorable little boy. So I really have no clue what she will look like and it’s killing me.  I hope the next weeks come fast (but not too fast I still have a ton of things to get done before she comes.) Here are a few pictures from the shower…

31 weeks